why i don't have an 18 month old and i am not a mother of 5

so i babysit my sister's three girls last night so she could enjoy a night out with her husband at a concert. they are ages 5, 3, and 18 months. for the most part the older kids were uneventful except for a few small incidences which were VERY manageable. typical stuff. she didn't share. she wanted that back. she blah blah blah. however, my little rachel mckea is a different story. she is sooo adorable but man is she a handful. i don't know how my sister does it.

Rachel managed to play in the toilet, oh, only about 4 times (kids forgot to shut the door after going potty).
She managed to spill only about two glasses of liquid (kids left their drinks around).
She pooped and left the poop in her diaper only a mere 3 times.
She pooped and removed her diaper and managed to have the poop smeared all over her a mere one time (i had to find the diaper, she came to me holding something saying "poop"... at least she told me and did not continue to play in it).
She found the bottle of orange glo wood floor cleaner and only had a sip (thank goodness it's all natural or something . . . i didn't have to call poison control. i just had to get her to drink two glasses of water).
she ran out into the front yard getting awfully close to the street just once (shawn left the back gate open).

these are just the things that i am aware of but i am sure it is pretty complete. i really did keep a watchful eye on her. she is just fast and sneaky. katie is a saint. now i know why she wants to borrow my crib when her baby (boy :) yeah!) comes in september...she needs somewhere to put rachie for sanity's sake (rachel can climb out of the crib but they invested in a crib tent back when she was pregnant with rachel so she could keep jenna, the baby then, under lock and key--it works great for rachel too).

wow.

and that, my friends, is why i have only two children.